Once upon a time in 2004, Ms. Mullen was nothing more than a lonely, grassy hilltop with a heart of gold. Poor little Ms. Mullen wanted to be something stylish, sexy and to find a suitor. Ms. Mullen decided it was time to strut her schtuff, so she got all showered up, shaved her long green whiskers and started making herself ready for a suitable mate. Along came her prince, architect Craig Steely, who saw her inner and modern beauty. Craig fell in love and decided to paint Ms. Mullen a portrait to show her all of what he saw she could be. Because Ms. Mullen started winning over the hearts of possible mates through Mr. Steely’s portrait, she felt it was time to get some practice in the “love department.” Ms. Mullen put on some clear heels and a short skirt and sold herself for $365K (little slut) after sitting on the corner [market] for 54 days. This made Ms. Mullen happy because she knew that soon, someday, somebody was going to make her look like her prince Steely saw her and that she’d be a champion in bed.
Craig Steely and some developers worked long and hard, night and day to make Ms. Mullen shine. With a sweet kiss, Ms. Mullen turned into 306 Mullen Ave. and looked like this:
306 Mullen Ave. felt so good, she felt alive! Her previously awkward slope now boasted 4 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms, clear cut and clean lines, views, a media room, a fountain, designer kitchen and lots of windows. But alas, Ms. Mullen was all alone again, only to find herself sitting on the market in November of 2007 with nobody to love. She sat there, alone, for 76 days and all anybody had to do was offer $2,295,000 to have her. All she wanted was somebody to be inside of her (to live! Get your mind out of the gutter!). Ms. Mullen was pulled from the market to sit by herself through the holiday’s and the rain. Nobody to turn on her heat to keep her warm, nobody to cook Christmas dinner for her :(.
Ms. Mullen had enough and Amanda Jones and Misha Breyburg have decided yet again that 306 Mullen needs a suitable love. They cleaned her up, slapped the same price tag across her face ($2,295,000) and are pimpin’ her out to the highest bidder.
Go see Ms. Mullen yourself this Sunday from 2:00-4:30 pm as her doors will be open for all.
Craig Steely [website]
306 Mullen Ave [Home San Francisco]
Listing and images provided courtesy of the MLS and Vanguard Properties; Agent: Amanda Jones and Misha Breyburg
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